


Under your skin

by vogue91



Category: Hey! Say! JUMP, Johnny's Entertainment
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Break Up, M/M, Rough Sex, Unrequited, Wax Play
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-24
Updated: 2018-05-24
Packaged: 2019-05-13 06:45:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14743923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vogue91/pseuds/vogue91
Summary: Hikaru touched Yuya, naked beneath him, and he didn’t seem to be able to stop.He kissed his neck, bit, licked and waited to hear him moan.Or to see him as involved as he was, or to feel his hands on him.





	Under your skin

Hikaru touched Yuya, naked beneath him, and he didn’t seem to be able to stop.

He kissed his neck, bit, licked and waited to hear him moan.

Or to see him as involved as he was, or to feel his hands on him.

But there was nothing, there was no reaction from Yuya, nothing telling him he was enjoying this as much as Hikaru was.

He stayed there, still, letting himself be touched and kissed and fucked, but always without any enthusiasm, as if he was but a shell lacking any content under Hikaru’s hands.

And perhaps he hoped the younger didn’t care, that he settled for what he gave him to be happy, as if it all was perfectly normal.

And during the past few weeks Hikaru had said nothing to him, he hadn't asked for explanations; because, after all, he didn’t need them.

Because he knew, and he had been knowing from the moment when, over a month ago, Yuya had knocked on his door and had let Hikaru have sex with him, without saying a thing.

And the next day, seeing how cold he and Chinen were with each other, he had understood.

And he had understood Yuya’s game, and he had felt used.

But he had opened his door to anyway the night after that, and again he had given him what he was asking for, because after all he wanted it too.

He started preparing him, but as usual Takaki waved his hand at him, telling him not to waste any time, to take him straight away, just as it went.

Hikaru tried every night not to hurt him, and every night Yuya seemed to need that pain even more, as if it was a very well deserved punishment, as if that was what he wanted, far more than to feel the younger on and inside him.

Hikaru wanted to grant him that. To punish him for real, and not for an imaginary guilt Takaki ascribed to himself, but for how he was hurting him, for the pained he consciously inflicted upon him, because he knew all too well how he felt, and he had just decided he didn’t give a damn.

He pulled out of his body abruptly, fighting against himself to do so, and getting off the bed.

Takaki sat up, looking at him with his eyes wide open.

“What’s wrong with you?”

Hikaru bit his lip.

He looked around the room, at their clothes spread on the floor, at the soft light coming from the candles.

He liked that light. Yuya looked always more beautiful when his skin was lit only by the clear flame, it made him want to touch him, to caress him, to test the texture of that very same skin.

It made him want to hold him close and never let him go, and he hated to think that it was never going to be like that.

Without answering to him, he went to the closet and took a scarf, getting back on the bed, and quickly tying Yuya’s wrists to the headrest, making sure he couldn’t move.

“Hikaru... what the hell are you doing?” the elder asked, looking more and more confused, but he didn’t struggle too much against that initiative.

“Want me to hurt you, Yuuyan?” Hikaru murmured, leaning over the nightstand and grabbing one of the candles, holding it thoughtfully while he got it closer to the other’s skin. “You think you deserve the pain, don’t you? You think you deserve me to hurt you, because who the hell knows what’s happened with Yuri. You think it’s going to make you feel better.” he took a deep breath. “Fine. That’s why I’m here.”

He tilted the candle then, letting a few droplets fall on the elder’s sternum, hearing him hiss for the sudden burn, seeing him writhe and pull on the scarf keeping his wrists in place.

“Hikaru!” he complained, wincing.

The younger stared at the white wax which had already hardened, becoming one with his skin.

He liked the sight, more than he would've thought.

“Want me to stop?” he asked, sarcastic. “Do you, really?”

Takaki kept quiet and turned his head the other way, so that he didn’t have to look at him.

Yaotome took that as a go-ahead, and wasn’t surprised by it.

Before Yuya and Chinen got together, it had happened too many times for Hikaru and Yuya to sleep together.

And he couldn’t help but wonder how it had come to this, and think about how different they had been before, because even though they had never been much inclined to tenderness, at least Hikaru then had the elder’s participation, and he felt him involved, and he felt empowered every time he managed to make him feel pleasure, to make him scream.

He didn’t ask for his love, he had never demanded that because he knew it was a desire destined to be left unfulfilled.

He only asked not to be humiliated, like he did every time he kept lying on that bed, letting himself be used by a man he was actually the one using.

He let some more wax drip on him, this time a little more, following the trail of the first drops and going down to his navel, relishing that pained and tormented look, the way he bit his lips and at the same time he pushed himself against him, asking for more of something he didn’t actually wanted.

“I’m so tired, Yuya.” Hikaru told him all of a sudden, still letting the wax drip on him, relishing how that pearly white clashed with his tanned skin.

“Tired of what?” the other asked, his voice broken and panting.

“Tired of you. Tired of this. Tired of being the second choice.” he bit his lip and went on with his task. “Because when you slept with me before it was because you had nothing better, and now you do it out of desperation, because you don’t have Yuri anymore. And you know what? You’re right, you deserve to suffer. You’re incapable of making the person you love happy, you can't make anyone happy, Yuya, not even yourself.” he said, while the last rivulet of wax sat down close to his groin, and Takaki made a chocked sound.

Then Hikaru seemed to have enough of it.

He blew out the candle and put it down, going back between the other’s legs and thrusting back inside, this time with the clear intent of giving him that pain he asked for.

And Yuya screamed, and he screamed during all of it, and pushed his hips against him, finally craving to feel him, to feel only him.

When the elder came, Hikaru could feel satisfied, because there was no trace left of Yuri in his eyes, nor of that melancholy that had never left him since a few weeks.

He came inside of him, pushing deeper, maybe hurting him even more and making his pleasure even greater, because he had decided he didn’t give a damn either.

He pulled out of that scorching hot body and, without saying a word, he untied Yuya, getting up and pulling his clothes off the floor.

Takaki’s face was unreadable while he scratched the wax off of himself, but from time to time he looked at the younger, waiting for him to say something.

“I don’t want you to come here anymore, Yuya.” Hikaru murmured then; the other opened his eyes wide, but he didn’t seem intentioned protest.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you, Hikaru.” he said, but then Hikaru saw that lack of emotion come back, and he understood he still didn’t care much about how Yaotome felt.

“I know. You just don’t care about what you leave behind yourself while you try to forget Chinen.”

And when he said this, Takaki seemed to realize this was an argument he couldn’t win.

Hikaru sat on the bed again, looking while the elder got dressed and left. Without looking at him, without hesitating.

He felt useless, empty.

He blew out the candles, one by one, and then laid down on that bed that still bore the strong scent of the wax and of Yuya’s skin.

Dignity, he decided, was a price he was never going to pay.


End file.
